“Real I” (2nd part)

A scene from the first version of a performance Unusual Wedding. Of course: the Market Stall Bishops: Lesław and Wacław Janiccy photo A. Callari

A scene from the first version of a performance Unusual Wedding. Of course: the Market Stall Bishops: Lesław and Wacław Janiccy photo A. Callari

“(…) I felt it was a fulfilment

of my obstinate thought

to the time of youth,
the time of “boyhood”.
(How many pictures did I make,

always with that image of

“a boy”.)

There was my home.

The real one.
I shall be dying without admitting

I am old.

 

Death and Love…

A scene from a performance Charon's Boat A group scene photo Jerzy Borowski

A scene from a performance Charon’s Boat A group scene photo Jerzy Borowski

The moment came

when I could not tell

one from the other.
I was enchanted by both.
Nights came,

because nights were my time of creation,
the nights came when death

carefully guarded the entrance
to my Poor

Little Room of Imagination.
I understood

that the time of victory had come.
Unfortunately out of this world.

To enter the stage –

no more as a “guardian” of a fortress,
which I protected from the admission of “playing” ,
but as

the real “I”,
needing no “play”,

no performing,

no pretending etc. …

 

I need

two methods.
The first:

not to say a word, t

o remain mute and empty

as a grave.
So Death advised me.

 

The second resulted

from my conviction

about the reaction of the audience,

the public;
the so called world

whose cynicism

has no parallel
I knew I could expect nothing

but derision

and mockery.

It was necessary to forestall this reaction.
I keep everything

in my hands.

Indifference,
derision,
malice of the world
I put in charge… of the actors,
the deplorable characters of the past.
They will do it better and more openly…

 

To make public

what in the life of an individual

has been most intimate,
and what contains

the highest value,
what to the “world”

seems to be ridiculous,
something small,
“poverty”.

 

Art brings this “poverty” into daylight.
Let it grow.
Let it rule.

 

This is the role of Art.”

 

Kantor, Tadeusz. Guide to the performance “I Shall Never Return”: Kraków 1990, p. 18-19.

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